Responsible Sports™ supports volunteer youth sports coaches
and parents who help our children succeed both on and off the field.

Ask the Expert | Youth Sports Advice from Positive Coaching Alliance

Positive Coaching Alliance Each week, we ask fans of Responsible Sports "What Would You Do?" in response to our weekly Responsible Sports Scenario Question. And many of you write in with scenario questions of your own! So we've asked Tina Syer, Associate Director at Positive Coaching Alliance, to answer one of your suggested questions each week.

A Responsible Sports Fan suggested the following Scenario Question:

A 10 to 12 year old Synchronized Skating team has a mandatory practice policy. Those skaters who regularly attend practice will have a greater opportunity to skate at competitions. The parents signed a contract with the policy at the beginning of the season. Now they are complaining because some of the stronger skaters may get pulled just because they haven't showed up to all the practices. We, as coaches, are rewarding the commitment and hard work of the skaters who showed up rather than skill. How do we get the parents to understand and respect these policies?

Dear Cindy,

I applaud you and your fellow coaches for sticking to the practice policies you communicated at the start of the season to your skaters and their parents. By doing this, you are teaching a powerful life lesson to your athletes - those who follow the team rules and put in 100% effort will be rewarded, and this is a lesson that will help them well into their adulthood.

As far as how to get the parents on board with this policy, I have a few ideas. Having them sign the contract outlining this policy at the start of the season is a wonderful first step. Have them keep a copy and have them return the signed one to you. Secondly, and this might seem really obvious, when they start to complain about this policy, remind them that you communicated this from the start and that they signed off on it before joining your team. People talk about the need for message bombardment, and you may have to remind parents about the policy again and again before they remember it.

Do you have a written coaching philosophy? If not, consider putting one in writing. This philosophy should be shared with your athletes and their parents/guardians, and it might mention that you reward commitment and hard work (over pure ability/skill) with the opportunity to skate in competitions. You can let athletes and their parents know your coaching philosophy before they join your team, and if they are not on board with this approach, they can look for another team.

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Want to submit a question of your own - either to get feedback from the Responsible Sports community or from Tina? Submit your scenario!

Tina Syer Ask the Expert
Tina Syer is the Associate Director of Positive Coaching Alliance, a nonprofit founded in the Stanford University Athletic Department.  Tina played Division I field hockey at Stanford University, where she graduated with honors in psychology and was named an Academic All-American. 

Her nine years of work for PCA have included keynote presentations for national organizations such as US Lacrosse, USA Water Polo and Special Olympics, more than 250 PCA workshop presentations, and production of multimedia products featuring PCA's National Spokesperson, Phil Jackson.  Tina's coaching experience includes seasons at the high school, college and Olympic Development levels.