Responsible Sports™ supports volunteer youth sports coaches
and parents who help our children succeed both on and off the field.

Ask the Expert | Youth Sports Advice from Positive Coaching Alliance

Positive Coaching Alliance Each week, we ask fans of Responsible Sports "What Would You Do?" in response to our weekly Responsible Sports Scenario Question. And many of you write in with scenario questions of your own! So we've asked Tina Syer, Associate Director at Positive Coaching Alliance, to answer one of your suggested questions each week.

A Responsible Sports Fan suggested the following Scenario Question:

A child said that the other team used offensive language as they lined up to shake hands. My son told me what he "heard" from a teammate and I went to the other team and brought it up. A parent asked 2 players, they said no. The parent then said he would investigate - zero tolerance for lewd language. I then found out that the child lied, that they did not use any lewd language. I want to write an apology note to this team in our travel league telling them that the information was false and acknowledging that I (parent) jumped the gun, did not check it out, approached the team parent at an inappropriate time (just after the game). How can I apologize to the coach?

Dear Janet,

I really appreciate your willingness to reach out to this opposing team to close the loop on this situation. Part of being a Responsible Sports Parent is admitting when you didn’t get something right, and by reaching out to this opposing team, you are truly Honoring the Game.

If you do not have the contact information for this opposing coach/team, I would put your message into an email to the league administrators, who can then forward your message on to the appropriate coach. In your email you could also ask the coach to share your follow-up with his or her team parents. I am sure these parents will really appreciate hearing from you.

PCA is always looking for ways to teach youth athletes life lessons, and your actions of owning up to not getting this right and reaching out to the other team to let them know the facts really models a responsible attitude from which your son (and his teammates) can learn.

For more, please visit the Responsible Parenting guide.

Learn more now!  
Want to submit a question of your own - either to get feedback from the Responsible Sports community or from Tina? Submit your scenario!

Tina Syer Ask the Expert
Tina Syer is the Associate Director of Positive Coaching Alliance, a nonprofit founded in the Stanford University Athletic Department.  Tina played Division I field hockey at Stanford University, where she graduated with honors in psychology and was named an Academic All-American. 

Her nine years of work for PCA have included keynote presentations for national organizations such as US Lacrosse, USA Water Polo and Special Olympics, more than 250 PCA workshop presentations, and production of multimedia products featuring PCA's National Spokesperson, Phil Jackson.  Tina's coaching experience includes seasons at the high school, college and Olympic Development levels.